Anger Management in Children

Before trying anger management in children, anger must be understood. There are three components of anger: the emotion itself, expression of anger and understanding and evaluating the emotion. The emotional state of anger is an arousal state or feeling caused by not reaching a goal or by having frustrated needs. Anger may be expressed in several ways, from facial expressions and crying to defending one’s position verbally or physically and to using aggressiveness. The third component of anger is evaluating it: only by understanding the emotion can it be regulated. Children are not fully able to understand this emotion and for that they need guidance. Also, they will come to better understand it as two basic cognitive processes develop in them: memory and language.

Anger management in children involves helping them manage their feelings non-aggressively and even using these feelings in constructive ways. There are two types of behaviors that may be discussed when it comes to anger management in children: self-referential and self-regulatory behaviors. Self-referential refers to being able to view oneself separate from the rest with an active role in the group. Self-regulation behaviors include controlling one’s impulses, the ability to resist with feelings of frustration and to wait for gratification when it doesn’t immediately occur.

Anger management in children may be done in the family or with the help of teachers. Children need to be helped to understand their emotions and then be guided towards using them constructively. Creating a safe emotional climate will help the child acknowledge all his feelings, whether positive or negative. Being a model for the child is also important: adults must take responsibility for their own anger and express it non-aggressively. An important practice where anger management in children is concerned is to encourage the child to speak freely about anger-arousing interactions. Making use of relevant books and stories is a good way to help a child understand and manage anger.